Bohol

Philippine Family Trip

We stepped out of the airport at night , and on to the hectic strip of sidewalk where only the sketchiest dudes try over and over to hook you up with a taxi, despite being told for a sixth time, “nah, man. Ride’s on its way.”

Embraced by the car fumes thickening the already dense, warm air, I had to let it sink in.

We did it. We’re really here.

I brought my very tiny crew (3 years, 14 months, & 14 months) to the other side of the planet.

They’ve had some practice, having ventured to Guatemala and Alaska at even earlier ages. Still, those are both only one country apart from us. Crossing the Pacific? A much bigger move.

We planned a stint in Honolulu to turn a 14 hour trip into two days of 7-hour travels. Then it was on to our home base for the next month.

The Philippines.

My kids aren’t likely to grow up with the same proximity to the culture that I did, however. i grew up with trays of pancit and pinakbet at every family gathering. Constant exposure to at least three Filipino languages. Trips to the Philippines every few years. In school, there were always groups of Filipino kids who hung out together, cultural heritage clubs. I actually never participated in those since it already felt like my exposure to the culture was abundant.

However, my kids are a generation removed from the members of our family who actually grew up in the Philippines. My FIlipino isn’t quite good enough for me to use it as a primary language with my kids. Their mom and that whole side of their family is not Filipino. We currently live in San Diego, which has a sizable Filipino community, so we’ve at least got that going.

But I understand that if I don’t put forth real effort, being Filipino might not mean very much to my kids. So we’re spending some time over there.

I don’t think I truly realized how much I value my Filipino ancestry until I became a dad.

My kids’ connection to that ancestry isn’t going to come as easily. The generations above me are getting older. The number of people I get to see in the Philippines is getting smaller. Elders become ancestors. Their childhoods, like mine, are set in the United States, and their ties to people who grew up on the Islands are more limited.

I want them to have a strong connection to the culture. I know it took me most of my life to get to the point where I appreciate it the way I do now, but I want them to have that same chance.

That’s a tall task for me on my own.

Thankfully I’ve got 7,000 islands to help.

Here’s hoping that this is the first of a childhood full of stories about those trips to the Philippines we took, the people we met, and the things we learned about ourselves.

The very first time I heard the term ‘diasporic longing,’ I knew right away what it meant.

It’s the itch for my kids to have their own sense of connection to the Philippines. The way mangroves and mango juice reminds you of your relationship with nature, and how you are not really all that separate from the rest of creation.

It’s the fact that the slower pace of life, the abundance mindset around time in the day, just feels right. It’s amazing how when you refuse to rush through everything, time feels less scarce.