#32 Rhys’ First Dog Beach
01 February 2020 // San Diego, California
The fireworks went off about a minute and a half into a YouTube video titled- What to do when your RV’s generator goes out? I could hear them reverberating all throughout Desert Hot Springs as the clock struck midnight. Meanwhile, I was playing electrician on a camper we had rented for the evening.
#33 Super Bowl Swaddle
02 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Ambition can be a really valuable thing. It can also quickly turn unhealthy.
Ambitious is a word that pops up often when others describe me, and I think that’s fair. I get excited about what’s possible. I tend to be optimistic about what can get done. I don’t want life to end without knowing that I gave it my best.
That said, sometimes I feel the negative side effects of my ambitious nature. Operating from a place of scarcity. Getting caught up in outcomes and people’s responses rather than the process.
Lately I’ve been curious about what that thin line is in between the upside of ambition and it’s unhealthy expression. I think I’ve found one spot where it lies.
It’s the difference between self-actualization and insecurity.
When ambition is healthy, it stems from a person’s desire to live up to their potential. It can come from a place of knowing that their life has a valuable purpose and not wanting to miss out on the purpose.
It doesn’t stem from the arrogance of thinking you’re there already, but from a desire to get there and the humility to see that gap.
On the flip side, ambition rooted in insecurity comes from a place of always trying to prove something. Instead of believing that you have a purpose you have yet to fulfill, an insecure person believes that they really don’t measure up and need to put on more of a show so others think they do.
Seeing this difference has helped me set my sights on constantly making sure my ambitious nature comes from a healthy place.
#34 Atomic Habits
03 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Earlier this month I wrote something that seemed to resonate with a bunch of people:
“Achieving a goal only changes your life for the moment. Setting up good systems, habits, or processes changes the way you do things, which actually leads to consistent and lasting results. And for me, I think that would look like truly showing up and being totally locked in to the moment in front of me. As a dad. As a storyteller. As an advocate.”
It’s taken some getting used to but I’m trying to step back from achieving certain outcomes with my creativity, my work, and my life and to spend more time appreciating the moment at hand.
This isn’t to say that I’ve completely rejected the importance of goals, strategy, and discipline- but I do think I got so fluent at those things that I lost the balance of loving the process. Over the past few weeks, I think I’ve been finding my way back to it.
That’s led me to days where I don’t get as much done as I would’ve hoped. To having to say no to more things than I’m used to. To allowing myself to be distracted more.
Ironically this has led to one of my most rewarding and creative months. I got a cool speaking opportunity in front of a small but significant crowd. I got my first invitation to be on somebody’s podcast since becoming a dad. I was invited back to Colombia. Something I wrote was read and shared by a leading climate scientist, and got a lot of traction.
It turned out to be a productive month. But more importantly, it was a fun month. And one densely packed with life.
It’s funny how sometimes loosening up your grip ultimately makes you stronger.
#35 What You Love, What You Hate
04 February 2020 // San Diego, California
James Clear said “Frequently change your methods. Rarely change your principles.”
I love this because it applies so broadly to different areas of life.
Like with money. Pretty much every year I further refine the way I go about crunching the numbers for our budget and figuring out how to be more efficient. But the principle of not spending more than I’m making, of being generous, and of trying to save stays fixed.
Or with the marketing work I do. In just three years I’ve tried out so many different tactics. But the core philosophy of adding value, building a strategy on generosity, and being honest stays firm.
My parenting methods will need to adapt in parallel with my kids’ development, though the principle of being present and loving unconditionally is fixed. Fitness methods always change. The principle of stewarding my health well doesn’t. Travel methods change, but not the principle of being open minded and leaving things better.
There is room for principles to evolve, but on a rare and deliberate basis. After all, we all grow. But part of growth is taking the most important things we know to be true, and making them fit the given circumstance.
#36 Morning at Cafeina
05 February 2020 // San Diego, California
I think one of the biggest fallacies out there is that things only get worse, the world only gets more polarized, and that human security is more vulnerable now than its ever been.
Bad news is simply louder than good news. When a recession strikes, everybody knows the day the markets all crash. But nobody waves a banner when recovery has happened. It barely gets noticed. When there’s an outbreak of a disease it commands headlines. But as it is cured or fades into rarity, that story doesn’t get told.
Things like LGBT issues or climate change can still trigger debates if you go looking for them, but not the way they used to ten years ago. While there are certainly other issues that have gotten more polarized- migration or gun control, for example, things don’t only move in that direction. Things also get depolarized. Maybe we just can’t be mad at all things all the time, and in those lapses is a fight between progress and apathy.
Finally, while there still are a number of threats to human security en made, it’s easy to forget that there used to be way, way more. Relative to history, we’ve got things pretty good.
#37 Young Hickory Mug
06 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What’s that topic that would seem like a nerdy deep-dive to most people, that you could actually riff on for hours?
For me it’s the weird intersection of creative storytelling, nonprofit work, sustainability and human rights.
This week I got to go on a podcast and talk pretty freely about those favorite things. One topic that came up frequently for us was the item of nonprofit social media.
To me, a lot of organizations seem to just shoot darts all over the place. Really, every single post is a chance for you to add value to other people’s lives.
And actually, there’s not really any reason why that wouldn’t apply to the way any of us have the opportunity to use social media. You don’t need to be a brand or corporate account to think about using your platform to add value.
One little blurb that came out of my mouth was that posts can inform, encourage, or inspire, and best of all, do some combination of the three. Surprisingly, my host knew the guy at REI who came up with the #OptOutside campaign and this was almost his exact methodology. (We had maybe one word of difference, but really, it was almost verbatim).
You hear often enough about the link between social media and self absorption and what that is doing to our society. Maybe this is a good strategy to be a more mindful user.
#38 Shake Shack Snack Break
07 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Things go by too fast. Gotta find some stillness.
I heard a couple of interviews this week that we’re on totally different topics but they ended up related to each other much more closely after listening.
The first was a conversation with Jennie Allen. She talked about how she’s always a had an unusually strong sensitivity to how quickly time passes. It’s sometimes hard for her to not think about it. She talked about not being able to send her kids off to school without thinking of them after finishing school.
She seemed so aware that this was taking her out of the moment. That the way one should respond to this awareness is to be more deeply present. But it became more like a thought she couldn’t get rid of, like an anxiety.
I related so strongly to that. The only other person I’ve heard articulate this experience so well was Elizabeth Gilbert.
I know for many people understanding that life moves fast and that you shouldn’t wait can be very motivating. But more often than not, it’s simply a reason I feel anxious a lot of the time. It triggers a felt need to jump in front of the day, to get ahead early, and to make the day so packed with activity there isn’t much breathing room.
The other interview I heard was with Ryan Holiday. He spoke a lot about stillness and described it as a moment at the end of a day playing with his kids and their dog. Time could stand still. It didn’t matter anymore.
That’s what I want more of. I need to escape the trap of thinking it could come just by getting ahead of schedule, because there will always be a felt scarcity. Maybe an abundance mindset can apply to having an abundance of time as well.
#39 100 Days of Rhys
08 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Official: it’s my 💯th day of being Rhys’ dad.
Shall we party?
In a lot of East Asian cultures, 100 days of life was kind of a big deal. 🗾 With poverty, food scarcity, and illness being commonplace, parents couldn’t take survival for granted.
I’ve had a considerably easier time with Rhys than my ancestors over on that side of the world would’ve had but I’m thankful all the same.
It’s impossible to say something that hasn’t already been said by any given new dad. All the stuff you usually hear is accurate. It’s beautiful and it changes everything. 💚 My heart has been so full and alive the past 100 days. Tummy time, skin to skin, favorite toys, wrestling with the cloth wrap, fluent gibberish, bathtime- I’ve been loving it all.
One of the best parts of my life right now is that every 3-4 hours I have to stop whatever I’m doing and go play. 🤾🏽♂️ It makes the world much lighter. What a way to live.
Now... how to celebrate? 🥟 Soup dumplings? 🍱 K-BBQ? 🍲 Pho noodles for a long life??
#40 Rainy Day Planters
09 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Are you having any fun?
Once I was asked in a job interview what unique thing I would bring to the table. Without even thinking, I let out the word “fun!” The interviewer wasn’t expecting that answer, and really, I wasn’t either. I immediately started to wonder if I should’ve said something else.
I was worried that if fun was my calling card, people might question my work ethic, overlook my other skills, and not take me seriously.
But also... we probably already take ourselves too seriously.
And who works harder than a kid engrossed in play?
And as a kid, I loved Ken Griffey Jr. not just cause he dominated, but because he looked like he was having a ridiculous amount of fun at the same time.
We like to remind ourselves that life isn’t all fun and games, but sometimes we teeter dangerously close to zero fun and no games. A spirit of lightness and fun is one of the most refreshing things our world could use more of right now. Imagine if all the mean-spirited snarkiness in the world and in places of power were rooted in a sense of humor based on honesty and humility. That would be FUN.
#41 Mission Beach Bar
10 February 2020 // San Diego, California
It’s hard not to succeed on your quest if you make it a priority to help as many people around you on their quest.
Video games get this. That’s why when you’re on your mission to collect keys or relics or whatever, you’ll find one that can only be collected by helping an old man you come across repair a snowmobile. Or something like that.
This is a philosophy of mine that applies to work, but also life in a broader, more spiritual sense. If you make it a target to be relentlessly helpful, you’ll build strong and loyal relationships that ultimately help you get to where you’re trying to go.
It’s hard to say this sometimes, without sounding like I’m advocating for reciprocity. Scratch your back if you scratch mine. That is probably the most insincere and ineffective way to do this.
To really offer value, build intimate connections, strengthen relationships, and provide legitimate help, you can’t simply do favors and check them off a list. This needs to simply become the way you do things. Muscle memory. It takes practice.
But, man, help people. So much of life becomes doable when you master the art of showing up for others.
#42 Oceanography Center Walk
11 February 2020 // San Diego, California
There’s something powerful about being someone who has mastered the art of asking good questions.
James Clear lists it among the top three skills to develop that pay off in many different areas of life. Alongside reading and getting proper sleep, it’s worth the effort to learn how to ask good questions.
Asking the right questions obviously leads to more learning. It’s also a disarming, humble gesture. At the same time, being a good question asker can also be smart approach to discussing contentious topics. It can force your partner to re-evaluate his or her train of thought.
Curiosity is a muscle. If you want to develop a true learner, don’t stuff them with knowledge. Cultivate their curiosity.
One caveat is that it’s gotta be sincere. I once complimented someone on their ability to ask questions, only I was never again able to hang out with them without feeling like being on a Barbara Walters special. Insincere question asking feels robotic and manipulative.
But real curiosity? That’s such a gift. With a healthy dose of it, the mind will travel far.
#43 TRACKSUIT RHYS
12 February 2020 // San Diego, California
I’ve noticed something that the very best writers, speakers, and thought leaders do: they speak to ambiguity, and in doing so, they eliminate it.
I’ve noticed the times my words get the best response, and it’s when I have called attention to a subject where there’s a lot of confusion, and that confusion seems to be affecting people.
Minimalism isn’t a new topic by any stretch. You can find themes of it interwoven through teachings in Buddhism, Christianity, and other faiths. But these traditions are millennia old and so every new generation is ripe to hear their messages in a way that’s clear to them, because over time, ambiguity accumulates.
So when the likes of Thich Nacht Thanh and Thomas Merton spoke to the virtues of simplicity, moderation, and humility, the theme of minimalism came alive. But there was still ambiguity about how to turn this into an actionable behavior.
In the early 2000s and 2010s, new bloggers came along showing us how to do just that. Joshua Becker, Leo Babauta and others really contributed to resolving ambiguity. The term Minimalism went from being mostly used to describe an aesthetic to a lifestyle.
Then came The Minimalists- offering even punchier, unambiguous posts. Marie Kondo resolves the ambiguity of how to be minimalist while still appreciating the life of an object. Now countless vloggers like Matt D’Avella showcase what that looks like in real life. More ambiguity busted.
What’s next? Maybe leaders who help us resolve the ambiguity between minimalism and having a large family, or all the nuances of race and privilege when it comes to Minimalism. There’s so much room left to explore.
When I talk about the environment and faith, I call attention to the fact that we are constantly confronted by these two topics but never seem to ask how they go together. In team settings, when I start to notice people not being on the same page about certain things but trying to make it work in roundabout ways, I’ll call attention to that.
When you call out ambiguity, you can then offer a new, helpful framework for people to think about the item. This provides both clarity and motivation to act.
#44 YERBA COURT
13 February 2020 // San Diego, California
One of my favorite ways people describe Jesus’ teachings is this: they afflicted the comforted and comforted the afflicted. In other words, He made people who were troubled feel at peace and He made those who felt comfortable uneasy.
I think about this description a lot when I think about what impact I’d like to have as a voice and with my writing and speaking opportunities.
There’s a time for me to speak to offer hope, to relieve people’s anxieties, to build bridges between groups that don’t see things eye-to-eye. Yes to all of that.
But also. There’s a time to challenge. There’s a time to light a fire.
I’ve spent a lot of my life aiming to say the right thing to please a crowd. I have a performative side. And saying things that bring hope, quench anxiety, feed wonder, and build bridges often please a crowd.
But lighting a fire doesn’t. And being a good steward of my platform wouldn’t be complete if I never lit fires. If I never sought to make those in comfort uncomfortable.
So let’s light some fires.
Not infernos that incinerate whatever they touch.
But sparks.
Sparks that catalyze engines and get wheels turning.
Because that’s what it takes to generate movement and change.
#45 Milkbar Birthday Cake
14 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Weirdly hoping this is our most boring Valentines Day yet!
We have a weird little track record of Valentine’s Day coinciding with either a nasty illness or a humongous life transition.
In five years of marriage it’s looked like:
2016: Being so sick we spent our first Valentines Day in the hospital
2017: Celebrating early, since I was interviewing for and eventually landing my job
2018: Sick again!
2019: We found the house we ended up buying and would find out we were pregnant just a few weeks after... so yeah. That one takes the cake.
2020: ❓❓❓
We probably aren’t up for any massive life changes right now (I suppose there’s some exceptions. I’ll take a radioactive spider bite that gives me powers.) And we’re sure thankful to be healthier than those other two years. We’ve also got our three month old in the fold.
We did, however, order a cake and truffles from Milk Bar that was awkwardly delivered to my office, and that sounds like the perfect level of excitement for me right now.
#46 Home Life
15 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Think of someone you admire. Really admire. Like, legendary status.
Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, Fred Rogers, Fannie Lou Hamer level. Y’know?
I heard somebody once say that every time you feel that spark of admiration for somebody as a hero, it’s cause of certain character traits and the fact that some of those traits are already in you, able to sprout with the right nurture.
One of the phrases I use a lot is- becoming the best version of yourself. It’s a beautiful, never-ending project. When it comes to my work in advocacy, creativity, and marketing, I think of it as inviting others to become the best versions of themselves.
It’s far from an original idea. The Old Testament highlights that everybody is made in the image of God. Value is embedded in everybody. Thomas Merton wrote a lot about a person’s true self. Same idea. All kinds of people talk about finding your inner child, though doing so actually takes a world of maturity!
I like this. I Iike the idea that the person each of us were made to be varies from person to person. It’s not about imitating your heroes, but finding your own true self. It’s the great plot twist found everywhere from the Wizard of Oz to Legally Blonde to Knives Out.
The thing you’ve been looking for has been with you all along.
#47 Harbor Island Harbor
16 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Have you ever thought about starting a nonprofit organization?
I did. In fact, if you went back and told my twenty year old self that I haven’t started one yet, I bet I’d be really surprised.
For the longest time, I knew that I wanted to work internationally, and I knew I wanted that work to help people. I wanted to eliminate poverty, fight injustice, and promote peacebuilding. I also knew I wanted to raise awareness for the cause, and help other people become passionate about it. I wanted to help other people find their purpose through helping other people.
I always figured my way to do this would be by starting a nonprofit organization.
I went to graduate school, getting degrees in international studies and nonprofit management.
I traveled to dozens of countries after school, discovering causes I cared about.
And I read a bunch of books by other people who started nonprofits, wanting to learn from their experience.
And after all that, I didn’t start a nonprofit!
I had a friend tell me that back in the nineties, young people were all about starting bands with their friends, but these days, young people start nonprofits.
But think of it this way, what do you think could help more people?
One hundred nonprofits in start-up mode, with teams of one or two people doing everything from fundraising to program work to the office admin just to survive?
Or one nonprofit with a staff of a hundred people, where each team-member could play to their strengths? With a fundraising department skilled at building relationships with donors. A field team that could develop the best program without having to worry as much about office work. Monitoring and statistics people who could make sure the organization was doing its best work. And office admin, finance people, and executive leaders who keep the wheels turning?
if everyone simply started organizations right and left to solve problems, we’d have countless orgs that are understaffed, struggling to survive. They’ll have a hard time making a big impact. What if instead we devoted all that energy to teams that were already established and doing good work, helping them grow and get even stronger.
Our culture tends to glorify heroes, founders, and charismatic leaders. And in the nonprofit world, that can actually become a problem. The savior complex has led to broken trust and disempowered people.
This isn’t to say that that’s the case for every nonprofit founder, or that nobody should ever start an organization. But people should think long and hard before committing to this. Ask yourself:
Are there already organizations out there working to solve the same problems I want to solve?
What is the most effective way I can contribute to this mission?
What are my real motivations?
When I asked myself these things, I started to see that it wasn’t for me. At least not right now.
All my preparation for running a nonprofit organization hasn’t gone to waste. These days, I work in creative storytelling and marketing for an organization called Plant With Purpose, an environmental nonprofit that’s older than I am!
The fact that the organization has already gone through the more difficult years of early growth, building an audience, and developing good systems allows me to focus on the things I enjoy the most, and that I do best...
...like launching a podcast!
...or telling stories from Haiti!
...or building a movement.
And maybe, just maybe, some day comes where I do start an organization. If that happens, I think I’ll be much better prepared for all the challenges that brings.
But right now, right here, I’m happy.
Thanks for watching, sign up for the newsletter below.
And remember, when compassion and creativity meet, amazing things happen!
#48 Kwaay Paay with Rhys
17 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What if the whole dream just doesn’t come true?
I was talking with a friend who moved to a new city to pursue her dream of an artistic career. It was a risky move, but one that seemed really right for her. When the next right step seems to be an equally good fit for your personal growth and your spiritual life and your career and purpose and everything… you just can’t say no!
But she’d been at it for a few years. Some big wins, but not the huge breakthrough she might’ve been hoping for. And when she said this was a question she’d been asking herself, I felt like I could relate. What if I never make the thing that reaches a large audience? That changes the way people see an issue en masse? What if that big surge of growth I’ve been looking for just doesn’t happen?
Then I realized, what if we asked another question?
What if the dream already came true and we didn’t know it?
I get to wake up most mornings looking forward to making things. She gets to rock crowds and temporarily take them away from their everyday lives and into the magic of a performance. I have an opportunity to speak about urgent and important issues. Somehow we’re able to do these things, have a blast, and still pay the bills.
Sure there will be other benchmarks, new levels, and next steps we’ll always be looking towards. But also… we’re doing it! And I know my twenty year old self would be pretty thrilled knowing everyday life could blend work and play so seamlessly.
Imagine if the genie gave you unlimited wishes, except with the catch that you’d never be able to realize it when a wish had been granted. That would be so anticlimactic! Here’s to the dreams that come true quietly.
#49 The Book of Unknown Americans
18 February 2020 // San Diego, California
“You just have to anticipate not being able to do as much as you used to.” –Ancient proverb from parents to newer parents.
This was, in fact, something I heard about a lot before having Rhys. And I was truly curious how hard that would strike. My off-switch doesn’t always work so well.
It is, in fact, no longer possible for me to work the way I used to. I’ve had to get stronger at telling people when there’s no longer room on my plate for things. I used to hate leaving tasks halfway done, but I’ve had to get used to doing that to take care of baby things.
But, I would hardly call this getting less done.
Some days we’ll read about more animals than leading zoologists. I’ll help this guy with more wardrobe changes than a fashion blogger. Sometimes those outfits ARE animals. We’ll read nine books a day. And I get to practice the art of hypnotism with mixed results.
I’ve had the best long weekend with our little man, and it keeps going!
#50 Cured Egg Yolk
19 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What do you do when you strike a creative rut?
Tell me if this sounds relatable. One day you’re firing on all cylinders. Your creative juices are flowing. It seems like you can’t put your ideas to paper quickly enough. You’d stay up all night working if you could.
But you can’t.
Then the next day comes. And suddenly, you’re stuck. Where does this story go next? What happened to all those ideas from yesterday? Why does this blank page just want to stay blank?
You’re not crazy for feeling like this. A few years ago, I got really curious about the idea of biorhythms. It’s a theory that different mental, emotional, and physical areas of your life ebb and flow. Some days your creative muscles are ready and able. But those other days…
It would be great if we could just wait around for our biorhythms or whatever to cooperate, but what happens when you need to constantly create things?
Let me share a few of my best tricks on how I stay inspired to create.
First, whenever an idea strikes, I capture it.
If I hear about an idea, from a friend, or a podcast, or a book that I can’t stop thinking about, I make sure to write it down somewhere. Oftentimes, the moment when these ideas strike are quite removed from the moment when you have a chance to sit down and start writing or creating something. When I do get to sit down, I want to be able to simply pull up the note of all the different things that have caught my attention.
I get a lot of ideas when scrolling through social media. So I take screenshots of links. I bookmark Tweets. On Instagram, I have quite a library of saved posts, from places I want to eat in town, to good quotes, and captions from others that made me think.
It’s like how before you cook a meal, you want to have all the ingredients ready, first.
A lot of people try to come up with ideas at the same time they try to write. And it’s so much harder that way. That’s why writers block is such a common thing. Ideas strike at the most random times. If you capture them well, then when it’s time for you to do the work, you just need to pop open your notebook and see what ideas are waiting for you.
It’s like opening your fridge and having a sense of what you have to work with for dinner. It’s just better than having to take the extra effort of going to the market each and every time.
Second, I write every night.
I journal every night before bed. And there aren’t really any rules as to what goes in my journal, just as long as I’m taking the time to write. Sometimes- hang on a sec-
This isn’t honest. I don’t use a notebook. I use Google Docs on my phone.
That’s better.
I’ll write about the day, but other times, I’ll just play with random ideas. About philosophy. About marketing. About anything really, whatever I need to let out of my head.
There’s no pressure to write well, or beautifully, since this won’t really make it past me. Unless I want it to. And a lot of times that ends up happening.
If I simply get out some thoughts and they never again see the light of day, then the exercise of thinking and writing alone is worth it. But quite often, I go back to these drafts. And sometimes they become the first iteration of something bigger.
Finally, I’ve traded entertainment for inspiration.
If at the end of a long day, you just need to put on Netflix to space out, there’s nothing wrong with that! Consuming series, movies, or books for pleasure is often talked down upon by creatives, as a reason why you’re not productive.
But, I’ve found that while I’m relaxing and taking in a story somebody else has created, I’m often challenged. I often feel strong emotions. I get new ideas.
I think of films like Parasite. Shows like Unbelievable. Books like Pachinko. These things entertained me. But they also inspired me. They had complex themes and raised as many questions as they answered. And they were entertaining at the same time.
It’s less about whether or not you watch, but how much you watch. And what you choose to watch.
This isn’t a perfect formula, but these are simple practices that help me keep up my creative flow. Thanks for watching, sign up for the newsletter below.
Remember, when compassion meets creativity, amazing things happen.
#51 UCSD Career Night
20 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What did you really need to hear your rookie year?
For the past three years a group of students at UCSD have invited me to talk about having a creative career, a nonprofit career, an international career, a career in sustainability, all that good stuff.
All the questions I got from students got the wheels turning. Here are some ideas that jumped out of our conversations.
Branding is all about making it clear how you help people become who they want to be. Want a good personal brand? Show how you can help.
The Growth Mindset is where it’s at! It’s one of the most valuable skills, because it gives birth to a bunch of other skills.
If it feels like you’re doing your work in front of a minuscule crowd, you’re in the sweet spot for taking chances and trying new things. If you’re doing your work in front of a massive crowd, then you must be doing something right!
One of the big things that separates a successful international nonprofit from the rest is whether or not the locals feel like they own the process of change.
School is one way to learn, far from the only way. 90% of the practical knowledge I put to use every day comes from podcasts, books, even Twitter accounts I follow. Keep investing in yourself.
The notion of not being able to earn a decent living doing nonprofit work is exaggerated. Plenty of decent, stable opportunities exist.
A job might not offer the highest pay, but do factor in other benefits, flexibility, growth opportunities, your ability to be yourself, a sense of purpose, and the team culture. Some of these are things money can’t buy.
Don’t worry too much about landing somewhere and getting stuck. Always keep looking for ways to do the work you want to do, even if you need to package it with other stuff that pays the bills. You keep evolving throughout the process.
#52 Boy Boy in a Basket
21 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Do you get more excited to see new places? Or for return trips?
Admittedly, I’m probably a bit biased towards the new sights. And that’s in spite of the fact that I’ve absolutely loved so many places I’ve been. But I guess my train of thought is that there are so many places in the world I want to see in my lifetime, I’ve got to be at least a little deliberate in getting out there to get to most of them.
That said, the appeal of going back to old favorites keeps growing over time, and there are definitely some places I’ve been where I could easily see myself having even more fun the second time around. Namely:
New Orleans – The food alone is reason to return. It felt like we barely scratched the surface on our last visit and that there’s plenty more to be seen and done. I especially want to look into an eco-friendly swamp visit.
Vancouver – Two years ago, we went for our anniversary and did a lot of fun stuff. I bet we could return, do none of the same things, and have an equally good time. That’s how much it felt like the city was overflowing with stuff that interested us.
Cape Town – A colorful city with a bit of an edge sandwiched between a mountain and two oceans. With penguins. It’s almost as if the city was designed for my tastes. If only it weren’t really, really far to get to.
Taipei – This was the last little solo-backpacking trip I took before getting married and I remember being surprised at how much I underestimated it. Taiwan has a lot of fun and quirky things, whilst being really accessible and easy to bop around.
Munich – Bavaria was my favorite part of Germany. And we only passed through on a Sunday when most things were closed. I could totally see myself enjoying more time in town.
Some exciting news: A New Orleans return trip is happening!
Where would you go back to?
#53 Skip Hop
22 February 2020 // San Diego, California
I love it when you start seeing the same message pop up in different places, from people and sources that definitely don’t know each other…
...and it starts to feel like that message is all meant for you.
This week, Scotty Russell posted an illustration of the phrase TAKE A DAMN BREAK, DON’T DIG YOURSELF AN EARLY GRAVE and it struck. My friend Gary also posted something similar about not doing work from a place of scarcity. And a couple of books and podcasts that came my way also had the same thought.
And it became really clear to me, that a break was exactly what I needed.
It’s been quite a month. Not hard, exactly, because we’ve had much harder times not long ago. But Deanna is studying for an exam that takes as much free time as she can luck out in having. That leaves me to take care of Rhys as much as possible. And there hasn’t been as much time for the fun and free stuff I normally enjoy.
And I realized, I’ve spent most of this month entering each day in a turbo-charged mentality, trying to simply get everything done. And I realized, there were a lot of unhealthy reasons why I kept doing this. Partly because it felt like I needed to work to prove things, partly because I kept believing in the false promise of “catching up” to a point where things slow down. That doesn’t really exist unless you make it.
So, I took a break. I dedicated my day to play with Rhys and I’m better off for it. The caption may have been right, I might’ve gotten a little more life back.
Sometimes, you just gotta listen to those messages that won’t leave you alone.
#54 Bubs
23 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What are things I love?
Baymax
Baobabs
Half Marathons
Alpacas
Mezcal
Thomas Merton
Pho
World Cups
Kim’s Convenience
Growlithe
Yosemite
Oat Milk
Powell’s Books
Trevor Noah
Codenames
Cape Town
Actualized Enneagram 8s
Walter Mitty
Public Speaking
What are things you love?
#55 I’m Still Here
24 February 2020 // San Diego, California
If you look at any given threatened forest or biodiversity hotspot... Australia... the Amazon... know what you’ll likely find?
An indigenous community on the frontlines of protecting it.
A couple years ago Jah Cho and some of his neighbors explained to me how their tribes were stateless, but that they relied on the forests of Northern Thailand for their survival. 🌲🌲🌲
In the past, local agencies would give them a really hard time, but they were persistent in showing good land management techniques as a community.
I then learned some other things:
🌐 Indigenous communities are about 5% of the Earth’s population
🌐 This part of the population manages about 20% of its land
🌐 That land contains 80% of its biodiversity
In spite of this, many governments and organizations overlook the role that indigenous communities have in protecting sensitive spaces.
I just published an essay on this for Plant With Purpose - and it includes some suggestions on what we could do. It’s one I’m especially fired up about, so I linked it in my bio.
How often do you hear about indigenous communities in the environmental discussions you come across?
#56 Tuesday Night Pho
25 February 2020 // San Diego, California
What gets you out of bed in the morning? What do you love doing? What makes you feel alive?
What keeps you up at night? What’s something in the world that makes you see red? That you just want to put an end to?
These questions seem simple. Some people just know the answers deeply and instantly. Others need to try out different things and do some exploring. But they’re always worth responding to.
I think these show you the things you can’t NOT do. You know? When I first learned about global justice issues, I really felt like I couldn’t just sit on that knowledge. When I’ve gotten the chance to speak to crowds to share that same passion, I always feel like, yeah, this is what I’m MEANTTOBEDOING with my life.
#57 We Have a Crawl Kid!
26 February 2020 // San Diego, California
~**gRAphIC DESiGn | iS | mY PASsioN**!~
Okay, so not entirely. If that was all I did, I’d miss the speaking, the storytelling, the scripting of other things. But I have fun with design. Lemme throw on a podcast and open up Photoshop or Illustrator, and I imagine that’s what serious gamers feel like. I’m happy it gets to be a component of what I do.
Recently I got to work on Plant With Purpose’s annual report. Not a totally original design, but I had to learn how to mimic the styles of past editions and give some pages a facelift. It was fun getting to figure out how to do that.
Creative design is about more than aesthetics. It’s about transmitting feelings, and in my work, it's the feeling of being invited. The first time I realized the world of nonprofit organizations could be for ME and not just older, wealthier, people in suits came when I saw organizations with branding and exciting visuals and gear that looked just like my vibe!
One of the unspoken questions people ask when they encounter new ideas, movements, or organizations is “is this for me???” The right design says HECK YES COME ON IN.
#58 Little Münster
27 February 2020 // San Diego, California
A couple of weeks ago, I got to participate in a career-related Q&A with International Studies students at UCSD.
This was the third year in a row I’ve gotten to do this event, and I’ve enjoyed it every time. Largely because these students are in the exact spot where I was not all that long ago.
So many of the questions I got were basically the same question packaged in different ways.
Should I take internships? Is it a good idea for me to work in Washington DC anyways? Do I need to spend time outside of the country to get experience?
Basically, people want to make sure they’re making the right next move. What do you say YES to?
I think these students are all right to recognize how valuable the next few years are. Actually, we all would be better served if we realized how valuable the time right in front of us is. Unfortunately as we get older, or just more caught up in the tasks of surviving and paying bills, we forget the value of time right in front of us. We miss the fact that each moment is an opportunity to invest.
The magic of spending time with my four month old keeps getting better and better. A week ago, I set Rhys down on a quilt on the ground and watched him roll over. And then he started kicking his legs. He was trying so hard to do something that I knew I had to turn my camera on and keep watching. And before I knew it, he crawled for the first time.
It was an instantaneous reminder that time was limited and precious. Having a kid has made me even more selective about how I choose to use my time.
Time is precious for all of us. Becoming a dad just increased my awareness of it. If I’m going to commit to something, it’s gotta be a wholehearted YES!
Every choice we make is an opportunity to invest… in the people we want to be and in the change we want to see.
So, why do people hold back from making the big investment?
Fear. It makes us instead spend our time on the things that get in the way of what matters.
Complacency. Settling for less than something we were made for.
Impatience. The best investors are the future-minded
Being a Creative Changemaker takes patience. You need the patience to keep showing in front of empty screens, blank pages, and small crowds. You need the patience to keep making incremental progress, while having a bigger vision. You need the patience to remember that lasting change doesn’t happen overnight.
But this patience can’t be an idle patience. It ‘s more like an investment. Take a lesson from those UCSD students and be intentional with the choices in front of you.
Damian Lillard said in an interview that if you want to look good in front of thousands, you need to work harder than thousands in front of nobody.
The hours you have today are tokens you get to invest in the person you want to become and the world you want to live in.
#59 Tree Lady Park
28 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Ash Wednesday this week is reminding me of Ash Wednesday last year.
That was the day we discovered we were pregnant. I remember the second pink line showing up in the morning. I remember nothing from work for the next eight hours. I remember the drive to Kaiser in the rain at night to get hormone levels checked and Googling what different amounts of HCG might possibly mean. I remember deciding to myself that I was going to be cautiously optimistic about it.
It’s been a crazy year since then.
Rhys started crawling on Ash Wednesday this year and that just seems appropriate. I know that Ash Wednesday is a day for memento mori and recognizing that our time on earth is finite. But the past couple years, I’ve also been reminded by it that our time on Earth is remarkably beautiful.
We are extremely fortunate to be parents. We are blessed to be Rhys’ parents. The more I look back on it now, the more I see how we both overcame really unlikely odds and extremely challenging circumstances to get to the joy we have today of our guy crawling around. It’s amazing.
#60 Four Months of Rhys
29 February 2020 // San Diego, California
Remember that time we had that baby Rhys join our lives? That was FOUR MONTHS AGO.
He keeps leveling up.
1️⃣🆙
The past month was a quieter one for us, Rhys took advantage of the time to do some serious growin’.
🍄⭐️🐢
He started sprouting little teeth. Didn’t think it could happen this early, but he kept messing with his tongue and there were some definite white teeth bits poking through.
Also we have a crawl kid now! [cue the underground theme 🎶] He’s been rolling around more often but can now officially bust out an army crawl.
I just love being this guy’s dad.