Philippe Lazaro
OCTOBER 2016

Rage Against the Unboxing Children

Whenever parents of young kids talk about how they handle the matter of screen time, it’s a really good opportunity to practice that whole Walt Whitman X Ted Lasso thing of being curious not judgemental.

I say this as I’m about to dive into something that’s one of the few regrets I have in my parenting journey a few years in.

Letting my guard down with YouTube.

I’m pretty thankful that as far as regrets go this is a minimal one, and it’s nothing extreme like having a five year old radicalized by some be-a-real-man weirdo with a vlog. It’s simply the fact that YouTube led to the introduction of my absolute least favorite programming my kids have seen.

Let me start by saying that YouTube became a tool not because of carelessness, but because we’re pretty intentional about what the kids get introduced to. At first, the opportunity to introduce *some culture* in the form of Tagalog nursery seemed like a good option over Cocomelon.

As the years went on, YouTube became the vehicle through which I introduced the kids to Moomin, and it’s hard to think of gentler, cuddlier content than that.

Pokémon is available on Netflix… until it isn’t. Right when the story hits the point where Pokemon: The First Movie was released, the episodes stop. The Official Pokemon Channel on YouTube can pick it up from there, and so if you want to keep up with Ash & Misty, that’s where you’ve got to go.

(Not Brock. The devout Pokémon fans will remember that during this story arc, Brock hangs back in Pallet Town with Ash’s mom for some reason.)

Anyways, so far so good. YouTube’s been a good tool to make deliberate introductions to some of the best things 90s animation had to offer.

Here’s where it starts to go sideways.

In preschool, we had a pretty big monster truck phase. The future ambition was to be a monster truck driver and all that. And so we loved Hot Wheels. And we got requests for Hot Wheels music videos and the animated series they made.

Not the highest value educational stuff, but also not terrible.

Until the algorithm starts to algorithm.

First you watch a few short episodes that the folks at Mattel actually produced out of one of their top franchises. They’re silly and fun enough. But the shows straddle the line between content and commercial. The thumbnails of the episodes don’t look terribly different from the thumbnails of video reviews. Unboxing. That sort of thing.

And that led to my least favorite bit of programming my kids have taken a liking to.

I don’t want to do an actual name drop, because I have no interest in either promoting the thing or making life worse for the kid behind it. I’m just gonna use the alias KidPlayz to refer to this channel.

KidPlayz is this child somewhere in the midwest. He’s apparently been online for some time because in some videos he appears about 5 or 6 and in others he may be 10 or 11. Anyways, this kid has an absurd amount of toys.

His channel is pretty much an unboxing channel. Most of his videos feature him testing out a new toy and assimilating it into his collection. His very massive collection. Of course, since his channel is a thinly veiled commercial for all these products, he and his family receive these shipments for free, creating this expectation from his young audience that it’s normal to have access to every toy in the world all at once.

A fairly large portion of his videos are product testing Hot Wheels cars and trucks by building racetracks for them. I didn’t mind this too much. Building racetracks has an element of creativity and science to it. I wish he was building them for a normal amount of vehicles and not the entire Marvel X Hot Wheels limited edition set, but hey.

I tried to be generous in finding the positives of this channel.

The kid does engage in some creative, imagined play… then again, if your kid ends up playing the exact same way he does rather than coming up with their own way, we might have to deduct some creativity points.

He does seem to have a present father who does this with him… but it’s also creepy that you mostly see the dad as an off-screen voice and never on camera. Is the guy unwilling to do what he’s making his kid do?

Ultimately, my issue was with the coached consumerism. The normalization of having a gluttony of playthings. And the constant hyping up of one product to then move on to the next one.

As much as I hated it… one of my kids loved it.

At first I thought his interest would die down and then move on to other things, as it goes with kids. And that happened. But then KidPlayz cycled back.

Still, I decided to take a cautious approach. We classified certain shows as “loud shows,” the things that I thought teetered on brainrot, and other shows as “calm shows,” things with an actual plot. That allowed us to whittle down time with KidPlayz. There were a couple more times I thought the interest was done, but then, it roared back up like a plumbing issue you were hoping would just “go away.”

As a parent, I’d rather not outright ban something my kid loves unless I clearly have to. A lot of times, you clearly have to. But the cost for using your parent power to strictly outlaw something is that it creates a mystique around that thing. I know. As a kid growing up in conservative church circles… I saw a lot of things with some pretty good mystique.

Maybe I could use tech against itself? Believe it or not, YouTube doesn’t let you block a single channel. Well… maybe that’s easy to believe. It allows that on YouTube Kids, but I’ll be honest, I don’t like YouTube kids. It quickly puts them on track to be served brainrot for kids, and I’d rather their recommendations be cut with all my workout vids and random travel vlogs.

I tried to retrain the algorithm. But unboxing channels and brainrot channels are like a hydra. You block one and another like it quickly takes its spot in the algorithm.

There are some absolutely terrible channels for kids that are mostly slapstick videos starring kids who seem forced into it by their parents. One of the downsides to technology enabling anyone to have a show is that… some people really shouldn’t have a show. And those people definitely shouldn’t be turning their children into entertainers for other children.

(As a side note, if you’re not already aware of all the drama that’s surrounded Ryan’s World- a popular kid unboxing toys channel from the mid 2010s… oh boy. The kid is now entering his teenage years and some of the late stage videos he seemed pretty painful.)

Anyways. Seasons changed. My kid went from one interest to another. Mario became the Ninja Turtles became Minecraft.

And then I was caught off guard when out of the blue I got another request to watch KidPlayz.

I was amazed. And not in a good way. KidPlayz had been a scourge of screentime to me for a couple years now… a kid being interested in a show for more than two years is like the Simpsons being on the air for nearly 40.

Anyways, when it became clear KidPlayz might be in our lives forever and ever if we didn’t allow it, I had to resort to some drastic measures: talking it out like a proper grown up.

It wasn’t exactly easy to package concepts like consumerism and materialism in a way that a five year old could grasp, but eventually we got to things like: things are good, but too many things can make it hard to enjoy or take care of our things the way they deserve. And they might make us so focused on things that we forget stuff that’s more important, like people.

Thankfully, I have a kid who has some pretty solid emotional intelligence. He said plainly, “yeah, I like watching KidPlayz cause I get so jealous.”

“Well then there’s that too!”

I explained how sometimes when kids make shows out of themselves playing, sometimes it becomes more like work than play. I noted that I was actually a bit worried about the Kid in KidPlayz.

I don’t know if I nailed this, to be honest. Screentime itself is a complicated topic. Sometimes I admire the parents who don’t let their kids watch anything not narrated by David Attenborough, then I remember, I watched Season One of The Pitt in less than a week. What kind of hypocrite would I be to be a purist against screen time?

I will say… I haven’t been asked to put on KidPlayz in a long, long time. Not since our conversation. Way better than a block button.

Kyle Schwarber

“Mr. Kyle Schwarber. I’ve been waiting all day to say this to you: Hello.”
–Barbara Howard, Abbott Elementary

Kyle Schwarber coming back to the Phillies is a clear win-win. People are worried about how old this core of Harper-Turner-Schwarber is gonna be at the end of the contracts in 2030, but you can’t hamstring 2025 out of that worry. No Schwarber averages out to missing out on almost a run a game. And you can’t do that more efficiently than you can with a 40+ homer threat.

14 Must-Try Items in Portugal

...and where to find them in Porto

Portuguese cuisine often flies under the radar. Its coastal position places more of an emphasis on seafood, while spices and oils punch up the flavor of hearty meats. On top of that, iconic sweets and wines add treats to every meal.

About a year ago, I got to spend a good chunk of time in Porto, enjoying every item on this list. This includes a three-a-day routine when it came to pastel de nata. 

I decided to curate a little list of the things you’ve got to try while in Portugal. Naturally my suggestions for where to find these goodies will be anchored in the Porto area. While Portuguese cuisine does have some strong regional tendencies, I can’t think of any reason why this same selection wouldn’t apply to other hubs where you might find yourself.

1 Francesinha

The Francesinha is an iconic Porto item… and it is heavy! It’s a sandwich stuffed with meats (steak, ham, sausage), then drenched in a rich tomato-beer sauce. It might be further topped with melted cheese and maybe a fried egg. Jokingly, I’ve made plans with a friend to open up a Philly-Portuguese fusion restaurant and to try and francesinha a cheesesteak. It’s true comfort food, Portuguese style.

I had one almost upon landing–at a nondescript café just outside the airport. The best one I wound up trying was at the Mercado Bom Sucesso food court. Café Santiago is widely seen as the iconic spot for the sandwich, but if you want something that feels a bit more like a well kept secret, head to O Golfinho.

2 Bacalhau à Brás

Salted cod is a national obsession in Portugal. Salty fish, sharp onions, hearty potatoes, and scrambled eggs. I’ll be honest, this isn’t always my favorite dish, but it’s a Portuguese essential. When it’s done right, I find it really satisfying.

This version mixes it with onions, matchstick-potatoes, and scrambled eggs for a creamy, comforting, savory-rich dish. It’s Portuguese soul food. Culto ao Bacalhau provides a cod-focused experience near Bolhão Market.

3 Bolinhos de Bacalhau

I wasn’t kidding when I said Portugal sure loves their salted cod. This iteration takes a fritter approach to it. These fried cod cakes are crispy outside, soft inside, salty and herby. It probably works best as a side or appetizer.

The Casa Portuguesa near the Mercado Bacalhau has them widely available and they’re probably some of the best you’ll find around town.

4 Polvo à Lagareiro

If you’re in Iberia, you’re gonna encounter quite a bit of octopus. Every market, every grocer. Polvo. I appreciate a well prepared octopus. This version has it roasted till almost smoky, drenched in olive oil and garlic. Rustic, simple, and so Atlantic.

This is a good dish to anchor a proper seafood tasca experience. It’s also a good option for getting a nicer dinner out along the Douro. Terreiro offers the roast octopus with a side of stunning Douro River views and serves a signature seared octopus dish.

5 Sardinhas Assadas

I’m surprised I made it as far as item number five before getting to sardines. Portugal sure loves canning its fish! Salt, char, maybe a squeeze of lemon - grilled sardines in season are fresh Atlantic bliss, summery, salty and smoky. Loved by locals since forever.

I don’t think I’d actually recommend going out for sardines. They’re tinned and meant to be portable! You can find some great artisan sardines at one of Porto’s many marketplaces.

6 Caldo Verde

Does every culture have its own cozy, feel-good soup? Portugal sure does! Comforting, simple, hearty. It’s a green soup with kale, potatoes, chouriço. You’ll find it on many casual menus throughout Porto.

Caldo Verde is a very hearty homestyle offering, so I recommend a spot like Cana Verde which manages to capture that vibe despite being a short walk from the Sao Bento station.

7 Bifana

Bifana is a sandwich that reminds me a little bit of milanesa. Garlicky, spiced pork slices stuffed in a bun. Imagine the pounded steak of a milanesa swapped out for a thin spiced pork cutlet, then put on a much fluffier bread roll. It’s a good sandwich alternative when you want something a little less wet than the francesinha.

The most frequently recommended Bifana spot is Conga… and they’re right! The location is convenient, walkable from the Trindade station.

8 Pastel de Nata

I’ve done a deep dive into pastel de nata… the sweet, flaky, creamy treat invented by monks ages ago and still going strong. Had dozens over the course of my three week visit.

Get them at a pastelaria or bakery anywhere in Porto’s historic center… often best first thing in the morning with a bica (espresso). Or if you’re in Lisbon wanting to indulge the history of this dish, check out Pasteis de Belém, a direct descendant from the monastic birthplace of this treat.

9 Queijo Serra da Estrela

Do you like sheep cheese? Portugal seems to do this especially well. Creamy, rustic, a bit tangy. Similar to my note about the sardines–find a market you love and a vendor who specializes at it. I’d suggest wandering the aisles of Mercado Bolhau for a bit, where you’re likely to run into a good option.

10 Arroz de Pato

Rice and duck is such a familiar Asian offering that it’s fun to have a Portuguese take on the comfort dish. Duck cooked until tender, shredded, then baked with rice infused with duck broth. I especially appreciate when it’s topped with chouriço, for an extra Portuguese feel. Smoky and satisfying.

A restaurant I heard highly recommended for this dish, but that I never got to try unfortunately was Zé Bota. It’s a staple!

11 Amêijoas à Bulhão Pato

Clams in garlic-olive oil-herb sauce. This is a good example of why Portugal is a dream for any fans of olive oil, garlic, and seafood working in combo. Light, briny, and utterly satisfying. It’s best found at seafood-heavy tascas and marisqueiras around Porto or nearby coastal towns.

You can find delicious Amêijoas à Bulhão Pato in Porto at seafood-focused spots like Ostras & Coisas, known for fresh seafood, and excellent traditional restaurants in nearby Matosinhos.

12 Polvo em Salmorejo

Another entry for octopus lovers. "Polvo em Salmorejo" is a dish pairing octopus with salmorejo, a traditional thick, cold tomato-based soup or cream from Southern Spain. Iberia’s love for octopus and seafood runs deep. Rustic, ocean-fresh, and deeply local.

I don’t have any Porto recommendations that are super specific to this dish but Treze Restaurante is praised for their octopus preparations in the Ribeira/Foz areas. 

13 Port Wine

Portugal’s wine pride: sweet, rich, often fortified is perfect after a heavy meal like francesinha or cod dishes. It’s part of the culture and heritage.

Decent port is widely available, even in your most basic grocery stores. We were pretty happy with what Pingo Doce had to offer. But I might also suggest booking a wine tour around the Douro Valley for a deeper cut.

14 Bica

A Bica in Portugal is Portugal's beloved version of an espresso, known for being strong, short, smooth, and slightly less bitter than Italian espresso due to lighter roasts, often served in small demitasse cups and enjoyed quickly at the counter with a pastry like a pastel de nata. The name is actually an acronym for "Beba Isto Com Açúcar" (Drink This With Sugar), a nod to its rich flavor that can be enjoyed plain or sweetened. 

There’s absolutely no shortage of spots around Porto for good Bica, but my personal favorite is Floresta Cafe right on Rue das Flores.

My Long Awaited Return to Philly

Despite growing up in Philly, I don’t go back very often. But that changed when I got to take Rhys on a short visit. It was weird but nice to be back to where I was living when I was his age. We also managed a cheesesteak taste test and a Phillies game, ofc.

Some of my favorite moments from my latest video:

🥖 Cheesesteak battle

🏡 Dropping by my literal childhood home

🌭 Shooting the Phillie Phanatic’s hot dog cannon

🍧 Water Ice

🇺🇿 Uzbekistan Restaurant

Had an amazing time taking a long overdue return trip to Philly and another good time making an overdue video about it.

Madiba

I’ve always been a fan of the archive photos of a young Nelson Mandela boxing, so I always wanted to draw up that side of his life. From what I can gather, he could hold his own as an amateur fighter and his appreciation for the sport stayed in character.

“I did not enjoy the violence of boxing so much as the science of it,” Mandela said. “I was intrigued by how one moved one’s body to protect oneself, how one used a strategy both to attack and retreat, how one paced oneself over a match.”

Finally, I root for the home team

I’ve been living in San Diego for almost ten years now. This isn’t even the first time I’ve called this city home. 

Throughout its history, San Diego hasn’t been much of a sports town if we’re being honest. You might think having outdoor weather year-round would be in its favor. Instead it means there are too many other ways to have fun. For most of my life, San Diego sports fans have had a reputation for mildness. Generally an afterthought in the sports world.

The city has yet to win a championship, but has lost two professional teams to relocation. That’s not so good.

When I moved here about ten years ago, the Padres were the only show in town. They had strung together about a dozen consecutive losing seasons. They weren’t generating much excitement.

Beyond that, my baseball loyalty was already booked. While I wish the Padres well, I’ve been a Phillies fan since I was a toddler in Philadelphia. So many plush Phanatics appeared in stores during the Phillies’ 1993 World Series run. It left an impression on me.

I usually make it to a couple games at Petco Park each year, and those are usually the Phillies’ games. I come decked in my Phillies gear, ready for whatever trash talk the local fans are bringing that day. To their credit, it tends to be mild and good-natured relative to most cities. When the two teams met in 2022 for an NLCS I would’ve never expected, I had more fun than ever attending a baseball game.

I wish the Padres well. They can go 156-6, as long as those 6 losses are to the Phillies. 

That said, I actually would like to root for the home team for once. I’d love to be on the same side as my friends and neighbors. It’s not gonna happen at a baseball game, though, and there aren't many other options.

Had the Chargers not left town, I don’t know if that would’ve done the trick. American football doesn’t hold the same appeal to me.

Then there's basketball...

If San Diego had an NBA team, I would be right in the crosshairs for that fan-base. I love watching basketball, and my attachment to a single team is a lot less solid than it is for baseball. I would have no problem going all-in on an NBA franchise here. That said, the Clippers left a long time ago. San Diego basketball rarely gets talked about as a possibility.

Then there’s soccer…

I’ve appreciated Major League Soccer. The league’s come a long way in the past ten years. And while I was a bit of a supporter of the Portland Timbers when living in Oregon, I wanted some closer action.

Soccer’s reception in the United States has come a long way, sort of like my appreciation for San Diego.

In 2020, I adored the San Diego Loyal–a new soccer club playing in the USL. This was a tier below the MLS. Not quite the same as having a full professional franchise. That said, the USL has some of the most interesting teams and emerging fan cultures these days. More often than not, they play in mid-size cities that embrace their local squads with vigor. And if you’re a fan of eclectic soccer jerseys… well that’s where some of the most eclectic releases get made. I’ve picked up jerseys repping Portland, Maine and Madison, Wisconsin over the past year.

Anyways, back to the Loyal…

I took a liking to that team right away. Their debut season came during the chaos of 2020, with no fans in the stands. That year, they forfeited two matches on principle. Members of opposing teams dropped homophobic slurs mid-match, and they took a stand. The Loyal got American soccer legend Landon Donovan to serve as head coach. He turned out to be excellent in the role.

It made so much sense for San Diego and soccer to click. We have such a diverse international population, and a position as a border town.

In a parallel world, I'd humor the idea of joining a supporter's group. It takes more time and money than I can spare at the moment. The community that forms in the long run, though, can be a beautiful thing.

A couple seasons into the Loyal’s run, two big things happened.

First, San Diego Wave FC formed in the NWSL. Women’s soccer! The Padres would no longer be the city’s lone representation at the top tier of professional sports. They also signed Alex Morgan for the final chapter of her playing career and that got things going.

Then Major League Soccer announced plans for a San Diego expansion. In my heart, I wished this meant the San Diego Loyal get promoted, like you’d see in a European League. MLS doesn’t quite work like that, though.

When San Diego FC came together a year ago, I admit I was skeptical. First, living in Oregon made me adopt the Portland Timbers. Their slogan of RCTID–Rose City ‘Til I Die– didn’t exactly come with an asterisk.

*’Til I Die or Move to a City that Gets an Expansion Team a Decade Later.

SDFC's birth aligned with an announcement that the San Diego Loyal would dissolve. This was a big disappointment to me. When they unveiled their branding, it looked like SDPD roleplay. They'd need to win me over.

It took about four games. They won two of them and only gave up two goals. Fifteen games into the season, they had only registered three losses. This team was good. Way better than you'd expect an expansion team to be in year one.

The squad had never played together until now. And they were rough around the edges in some way. They managed to flip that to their advantage in many games by being unpredictable. The Danish transfer Anders Dreyer turned out to be an absolute superstar. The rest of our team was so solid that our star player at the beginning of the year ended up being a super-sub.

SDFC finished this past season in first place. They put the best expansion season in history.

Some friends couldn't use their tickets to a playoff game, so I found myself in attendance. A pleasant surprise! And the team was solid the whole way through. They scored four goals, eliminating the Portland Timbers.

They continued the playoff run a little bit longer. Vancouver would be the team to knock them outa win away from the MLS Cup. While it was sad to see a true Cinderella season come to an end, by all means they exceeded expectations.

In many ways, San Diego is an underachiever of a sports town. More relocations than championships. And you’d think I already endured plenty of disappointment as a Phillies fan. But there’s still something special about rooting for the home team. I’m happy to finally have a chance.

Fall '25

Fall 2025, closing strong! Lots of family outings and we made it through everybody’s birthdays.

The era of raising toddlers was so gargantuan, it’s kinda wild that we’ve got them all north of four now. Thankful for the good times, the spooky seasons, and the crisp air.

Winter 2025

12/1 – Sad to see such a fun season for San Diego FC end just one win shy of the MLS Cup. Hard to ask for a better inaugural year though! Loved watching this squad.

12/1 – My semi-improvised, Severance-themed Christmas musical opened last night. Chaotic but lots of fun. Three more shows this month!

12/3 – Took the NC Transit’s Holiday Express Train with the kids… and a few guest appearances on board. Love knowing that these are the years to go all-in on Christmas.

12/14 – These December weekends! Serving up another opp to go full Christmascore.

12/24 – Well that was an incredible Christmas Eve!

12/20 – Wrapped up playing in Severed at the North Pole—a Severance inspired, semi-improvised Christmas musical last night. Even got to slide into the Milchick-role (Elfchick!) for the last hurrah.

Can’t say an opportunity like that comes up too often and I had so much fun with this production.

1/1 – New Year, New Regrets

1/15 – I know it never seemed too likely, but I wish the Phillies considered bringing back Ranger more seriously, especially with different uncertainties around Wheeler, Painter, and Nola.Best playoff pitcher of the decade. Great team player.

My Guide to Aotearoa

Last summer… we did it. My wife and I took our first trip without the kids.

Our moms gave a generous anniversary present of watching them. Thus, we were able to celebrate ten years together by going to the other side of the planet.

It was a hard-earned and long-anticipated trip in so many ways. The fact that our kids are at an age where this is doable is an accomplishment in and of itself. So is hitting that ten year mark. We wanted to go somewhere big.

It so happened that New Zealand had been sitting at the top of our bucket lists for quite some time.

Why New Zealand?

I mean, New Zealand is an epic place on so many levels, but here’s the thing that appealed to us the most:

Natural Beauty. We’d seen the pictures. We’d seen The Hobbit. The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe. And my favorite depiction of the New Zealand bush: The Hunt for the Wilderpeople. All this it stirred up a longing to be in those wide open spaces taking deep breaths, you know?

New Zealand’s an adventure hub. That kind of goes hand in hand with all the natural wonders. If you like to experience nature in ways that need a harness, crampons, or some other gear, it’s a spot you’ll likely enjoy. The natural beauty spans both of its islands. A lot of colder and more mountainous type adventures tend to hang out on the southern edge of South Island.

Cheeky Kiwi humour. I’ve already riffed on people’s different takes on humor around the world. In doing so, I expressed appropriate envy towards how funny everyone in New Zealand seems to be. They make it seem effortless.

It’s the edge of the world. I mean, picking a spot to be the “edge of the world” will always be pretty arbitrary. The southerness, proximity to the date line, and isolation give New Zealand an edge. As a geography buff, it tickles.

Lots of options for places to visit. Auckland’s where all the urban excitement is, and you can still drive to some gorgeous state parks. Christchurch is chill vibes. The cities to its south bring nature and adventure… especially Queenstown and Dunedin. Rotorua is the spot to go to catch more Maori experiences. Wellington is a little too easy to underestimate. You’ll leave with several spots on your “next time” list.

Where to Stay

Cordis (Auckland)

This was a bit of a higher-end hotel than we’d typically go for. We had a pass-through night in Auckland though. After a long flight pampering ourselves felt appropriate. The rooms were comfy and the on-site pub was good for dinner. The next morning, I got to wake up to one of the best breakfasts of my life. The hotel-restaurant, 8, represents eight different cuisines that are prominent in New Zealand. They take that approach with the most important meal of the day as well.

SO/ (Auckland)

Another Auckland favorite. The room we had was a bit funny- a luxurious bathtub sat in the center of the room, the bed and TV relegated to a side. Almost as if the room prioritized being a bathroom. I thought it was funny. The location was great, and we could walk to the ferry terminal or into downtown Auckland.

The Observatory Hotel (Christchurch)

This spot is one of my favorite hotels ever. It’s official. A converted university site with rooms that feel like home. The drawing room is one of the coziest sites ever. The whole complex sits right across from the Botanical Gardens. A very easy walk can get you into the heart of the city in less than ten minutes.

Scenic Suites (Queenstown)

This one’s a bit more pricey, but lives up to its name with a water view. If you were aiming for a cozy day and trying to make the hotel part of the experience, this is a good bet. Queenstown lodging tends to run a bit higher than most of New Zealand anyways, so might as well lean into it.

Novotel Lakeside (Queenstown)

If you do want to do Queenstown on more of a budget, the Novotel looks great and feels complete. Plus, it still gives you that lake view.

The Chamberson (Dunedin)

It’s a boutique hotel in a historic building. I often hear of families raving about it as a more home-style accommodation.

My Top Three

1) Castle Hill Rocks

This site is famous for being the location where they filmed Narnia. The battle scene for The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe to be exact. But even if it wasn’t that… this would still be a worthwhile place to go.

Large, ancient, limestone boulders sit in the center of an otherwise open expanse. They’re surrounded of rolling golden hills. Astonishing. A Maori sacred site. I found it breathtaking.

2) The Observatory Hotel in Christchurch

Yes, I already mentioned this in my where-to-stay section, but I’m double dipping! I must continue to talk up The Observatory. It is in a repurposed university. You can tell by the doors that have Science or Phys Ed labeled above them. That said, they made plenty more out of the school than a hotel. The complex includes a wine bar, a paint-and-sip spot, a pub, a restaurant, and an occasional market. There’s a full-on cinema that was having a French film festival while we were there. There’s a dance studio. The top level of the hotel is a rotating exhibit. It was highlighting the Maori Creation Story at the time of our visit.

3) Waitomo Gloworm Caves in Hamilton

This was one of those experiences that left me thinking… wow… I get to be alive! The glowworm caves in Waitomo were an unreal experience. After stepping into the limestone caves, our guides led us on a boat ride down the river. It brought us right up close to the glowing blue worms hanging overhead. Breathtaking.

Essential Eating

Check out the impressive food halls.

Most of New Zealand’s cities have a signature food hall. Some have more than that! We got our best taste of it in Christchurch.

Riverside Market (Christchurch)

Some boutiques and three dozen restaurants representing all kinds of cuisines. Some nights, I had to get two meals from here to try it all. Some of our favorites included: A dosa restaurant. A woodfired pizza spot. A Nepali momo stand, a gin bar, and the Argentine street kitchen. Apologies for not remembering any of their proper names.

Little High Market (Christchurch)

It’s hard to imagine that you would even need an alternative to the Riverside Market. But there’s this! It’s got some good eats of its own. I had a great lamb shank curry from the Thai spot here.

Hangi

Hangi is traditional maori cooking, where meats, staples, and veggies steamed in a pit oven.

The Hangi Shop (Auckland)

It’s in a somewhat busy and unsuspecting part of town. It’s also one of your best bets to try Hangi when passing through Auckland.

Mitai Maori Village (Rotorua)

Rotorua has the most pronounced Maori presence of New Zealand’s urban centers. The Mitai Maori Village is a full cultural center in a bush setting. People rave about their hangi.

The Stoaker Room (Cromwell)

So, this one isn’t Hangi. I included it in because it’s the invention of a winemaker who began smoking meats in aged wine barrels.

Gastropubs

Funny enough, my hometown has a surplus of New Zealand restaurants. Most of them are gastropubs focused on burgers and beers. Turns out, that’s because New Zealand does those things quite well.

OGB (Christchurch)

Despite me calling it OBG by mistake, it’s in a stunning building with good cocktails and pub foods.

The Church (Christchurch)

A pub built in a literal repurposed church. This place is always lively at night.

The Occidental (Auckland)

Belgian pub in downtown Auckland. Impressive taplist.

Asian Food in Auckland

Auckland’s got a strong Asian population and proximity to Southeast Asia. With that comes some great food.

Java (Auckland)

Indonesian food is incredible and not always easy to find back in the US. Java is splendid.

Jeepney Filipino Restaurant (Auckland)

Great menu with both fan favorites and deep cuts. Good location right on K-Street.

Wine Tasting, of course

How could you not? We booked a proper wine trail which was a good way to get a more personal introduction to the winemakers

Waipara Springs Winery (Waipara)

Gorgeous site, and their lunch menu comes with a wide variety of good eats.

Georges Road Winery (Waipara)

We loved Pepper, the dog who lived on site, as well as all the Syrah. Wonderful family-ran business.

For some fine dining

Twentyseven Steps (Christchurch)

This was our official anniversary dinner, as in, what we ate the night of our proper anniversary. Inventive dishes, good cocktails, cozy space. Loved this restaurant.

Other Things to See and Do In…

Hamilton

Hobbiton

The Shire is New Zealand’s most touristy thing to do… and you know what? Because this is New Zealand, it’s still way chill. I loved the Hobbit Home designed to accommodate a walkthrough. I loved the recreation of the Green Dragon Tavern. It complete with their own proprietary beers. Hope you don’t like it too much, though… this is the only place you can get it!

Auckland

Take the Ferry to Other Points

The Auckland Ferry works well. It can get you to some of the small islands and communities across from Auckland. We considered Rangitoto Island, which is a volcanic cone island and nature reserve. Waiheke Island would’ve also brought beaches and wineries in a scenic spot. We ended up taking the ferry to Devonport, a suburb with an awesome library and great used bookstores.

Piha Beach

I’m no fan of left-hand driving, but I sucked it up and rented a car. It’s that easy to get to Piha Beach State Park from Auckland. Here we saw some impressive waves. Gorgeous rock formations draped a black sand beach at winter.

Kitekite Falls

We did this on the same visit as Piha Beach and it ended up being one of my favorite New Zealand experiences. A two mile hike takes you through some gorgeous North Island flora to Kitekite. An impressive waterfall! Its pool works well as a swim hole.

Catch an All Blacks Match (or Experience)

When I studied abroad in Australia in high school, I fell in love with (and got beat up from) rugby. I still find it much more entertaining than American football. I was keen on catching an All Blacks match in Auckland. Unfortunately, the schedule didn’t quite allow for it. But there is an All Blacks Experience in town that pretty much runs year round.

Hit Up the Vintage Shops

Auckland has a pretty impressive offering of vintage shops. They reminded me of what thrifting used to be like. I assume other New Zealand cities do as well. I picked up a great 80s starter jacket from Smoove at St. Kevins Arcade which is a good spot to start a thrifting outing.

South Island

Arthur’s Pass National Park

Home of the kea, New Zealand’s mischievous alpine parrot. We visited on a rainy day and still managed a hike up to the top of Devil’s Punchbowl. Gorgeous view.

TraNZAlpine Scenic Railway

This is a nice option for going between Christchurch and Arthur’s Pass. The train comes set with a snack car. It also has a viewing car where you can get some open-air looks at the remote edges of South Island.

Christchurch

Christchurch Botanical Garden

I loved the city’s Botanical Garden. So many different walking spots and an impressive collection of diverse plant species. When I was there, some big Pokemon Go event was happening, so glad to see that its still going strong in New Zealand. There was also an Alice in Wonderland themed scavenger hunt. It was for the kiddos that we wound up participating in.

Earthquake Memorials

Christchurch’s devastating 2011 earthquake and further rebuild are hard to look past. Everything is new and most locals have stories to tell. One of the closest looks we got at the whole ordeal was via the Cardboard Cathedral.

Enjoy the Gathering Centers

When Christchurch began its rebuild, many Maori leaders contributed to the design. They planned gathering centers around rivers. This keeps with customs, incorporating food where possible. The Avon runs by the Riverside Food Market. And the Bridge of Remembrance. And the Margaret Mahy Playground.

The Te Araroa Trail

I heard so much about the adventures in Queenstown that are now at the top of my next-time list. One thing I’d love to do if I ever got extended time in New Zealand would be to try and hike the Te Araroa Trail. The trail spans the whole country and can take as much as 4-6 months.